that's MRS vagabond to you (Iz Married Now)

 You know how you have some friends that kind of fall in and out of touch, and you don't really know when they're coming back into your life again, but when they do you guys can just pick up like you've been in touch the whole time? 

Let's do that. 

SO I got married y'all! At first it was rough. I had been asked to leave the country of our residence, which is not the country of our citizenship. Apparently countries are allowed to do that. I was kind of emotional about the whole thing, but got okay with talking about it, and was kind of proud to be able to say that no, mom, I wasn't deported. The small victories. Unfortunately, it also meant that for the 4 months leading up to the wedding, my fiance and I were on different continents. It wasn't easy, but we made it through. The wedding was amazeballs and one of the best days of my life thus far. Weddings: my new favorite thing (this also became apparent when I was at a friend's wedding a bit later, and realized it's so much more fun when it's not your own wedding). The last thing that this not-deportation meant that four days after we got married, my husband flew back to our apartment, in a country where I was no longer welcome. Snapshot into my life after that:

person: Hey Mrs Vagabond, how's married life????

me: It super sucks so far

person: le WHAT? why?

me: My husband lives in England and they won't let me back in.

(crickets)

But we got over that, and I made my way back in. The 5 minutes that the UK border agent had my passport in their back room was the longest 5 minutes of my life. I honestly had it in my head that they were going to take me into a back room, with a single bare lightbulb (law and order interrogation room style) and maybe anally probe me. Probably anally examine me. I was worried that if I wanted to get in the country, I would have to sacrifice my anus.

Freedom ain't free, y'know?

Lucky for everyone involved, they left me and my diddlyhole alone. Yay!

un-diddled

Now I am in our glorious living room, steaming it up with a turnt up heater and loads of laundry, updating my blog because I was inspired by my adorable friend's adorable co-blog with her adorable boyfriend about how they like to run and be healthy... and adorable. Barf bleuuurgh yech. But seriously we'll love them and barf at the idea of them later.

No one has really brought this up yet (probably because the last attempt was so awkward) but, if I did have this conversation, here's how it would go:

person: How's married life???

me: OMG it's the BEST, everyone should do it! Now! All the weddings! Down with DOMA (shout out to my sister making love happen all over the state of NJ). Blah blah, love and unicorns, beaming like I'm backlit in the sunshine blah blah love love love -- then you just kind of tune out because wth? chick needs to calm down with that mess

(crickets....like, seriously, how do you even respond to that? she's nuts.)

Hmm. Maybe I should find better ways of responding to that question. Oh well. So pretty much, for the past couple of weeks, I've been floating around on a cloud of nuptual bliss and laundry steam, and it's lovely, and I am annoying about it and don't even care.

Et ils se marierent et eurent beaucoup des enfants.